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Shootin’ the Breeze
January
2004
by
Bummer
Email:
bummer@abate.com
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Well, we made it thru another one
huh? Like most of ya, that means I’ll be writin’ the
wrong dates on my checks for a while. I worked the
ABATE booth at a local swap meet the other day and saw
a bunch of people I haven’t seen for a while. One was
a fella named Skunk who rode a sweet old knucklehead
chop with a girder front end. He built that bike a
long time ago and I still remember the nights in his
garage as he wrenched on ‘er. One night we took a
break and headed down to the Bottle and Cork [the
local watering hole]. Now, Skunk is a pretty big dude,
but he’s mellow as hell. The bar was really crowded
and there were a lot of strangers there that night. As
sometimes happens the smallest, meanest lil’ asshole
with a chip on his shoulder decided he was gonna
proove himself by pickin’ on the baddest lookin’ dude
in the bar, which just happened to be Skunk. After
ignoring this jerk for a long time finally Skunk had
enough when the weasel nudged up beside him and
spilled his drink. Skunk just looked down at him in
disgust and said, “You owe me a drink man.” “Hey
buddy, YOU spilled it. YOU replace it. I was just
tryin’ to get served.” “Listen man, I don’t want no
trouble. Ya spilled my drink. Buy another and it’s
forgotten.” The guy acted like he was reachin’ for his
wallet and sucker punched Skunk in the gut. Thing is,
Skunk was ready for him and the lil’ guy’s fist just
bounced off! [Did I mention Skunk was an apprentice
bricklayer? He toted brick and cement block for a
livin’!] Without missing a beat Skunk bonked the guy
on top of the head like he was hammerin’ a nail. The
guy fell to the floor as Skunk turned and asked the
barkeep for another drink. Then he turns to me and
asks, “Now what were we talkin’ ’bout Bum?”
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After a few months I moved away from Skunk and we
rarely see each other now, but we remain good friends.
One of the things that make lasting friendships is
experiences shared, and we shared quite a few. Usually
this requires knowing someone for a long time, but not
always. I’ve met people in ABATE that I’ve only known
a short time and see rarely, yet I consider them good
friends. Probably because we share so much in common.
I plan on seein’ a few of these people at the seminar
coming up the weekend of Feb. 7th. If ya never been to
one and yer interested in goin’, take my word for it:
It’s a great time and very worth the effort. Hell,
it’s worth it just to see the expressions on the staff
and other customers when a classy hotel is taken over
by bikers for the weekend! There’s even an indoor
ceement pond! Gettin’ back to the swap meet, as we
stood lookin’ at some old timer’s parts I noticed
Skunk handling a thru the tank fuel valve that would
only fit a knuckle, a flathead or an early pan. “Still
got ’er huh?” “Oh yeah. Been restoring her for the
past few years. Had a hard time findin’ parts, but
just about got it all done now. Had a hell of a time
with that frame, but I de-raked it.” I kinda wish he
would have left it as a chopper, but didn’t say
anything. Before we parted I mentioned that night at
the Bottle and Cork and he just smiled. “Ever find out
who that lil’ guy was?” “He ended up becoming an
assistant district attorney!” Now the lil’ sucker can
pick on everybody.
Hope to see ya at the seminar,
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“I forget. Think we oughta move? This guy might be
dead.” “Ya think?” Then he prodded him with his boot.
When he STILL didn’t move Skunk looked at me and we
finished our drinks REAL quick. As casually as
possible we headed for the door, but by the time we
got there we heard someone scream, “HE’S GOT A GUN!!”
and dove out just as Mighty Mouse fired off a few
rounds. Now, at this point I’d like to take a moment
to mention to those of you who have never been in the
situation, that being shot at brings you closer to
God. Havin’ a gun pointed at ya wakes ya up, but bein’
shot at makes ya feel awful sorry for a lot of things
ya done, and sorrier for things ya didn’t do. Actually
BEIN’ shot is something all together different, but I
don’t wanna go into that here and now. Skunk’s old
pickup was clear across the big parking lot and as we
scrambled to our feet it seemed even further. We
hadn’t even taken a few running steps when the fella
ran out the door behind us and raised his gun, but
before we got any further we heard a loud “Click”. I
kept on runnin’, but Skunk stopped, turned around and
started yellin’, “ONLY A DAMNED SISSY USES A GUN IN A
BARFIGHT!!!” and proceeded to disarm the lil’ fella
with a few slaps to go with it. The only thing I
wanted to do was get the hell outta there, so I yelled
to Skunk and we finally left. Now Skunk, [not his real
name] pulled out the gun as we drove away, looked at
it and said, “Looks like I got a new gun anyway.”
Don’t know what became of it and don’t wanna know. All
I know is he kinda earned it I guess. Although lotsa
people in the bar knew us, we never heard any more
about it. We headed back to his garage, had more than
a few drinks and sat there talkin’ way into the night.
Gettin’ shot at does that to ya too. It makes ya wanna
talk.
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